Haikus are easy.
But sometimes they don't make sense.
Refrigerator.

I'm not that creative :(

Checking on my thread
You can do better broheim
Pic unrelated

I'm blind in one eye
It doesn't hurt to blink though
it hurts me to think.

Well, fuck me running.
A haiku thread, hmm? Too bad
I can't think of one.

What makes it haiku
Is the subject matter, not
Just the syllables

SAGE has been used.

>>232
Men are natural
Everything is nature
if it is on earth

i am quite hungry
and I want some good munchies
not asparagus

A tranquil desktop
I lurk round' 99 chan
This isn't nature!

I am Doctor Love.
I lurk around Ninety-Nine.
I suck at haiku.
:(

five smelly niggers
all lined up in a neat row
stroking their horse cocks

he is always here.
Tiny is the fucking man.
truly young at heart.

Play minecraft all day
Bat-cave ain't got shit on me
Oh fuck more creepers

smoke a cigarette
listen to peyote songs
it is a good night

>>254
Whats with my ID?
it suddenly changed on me
thats not what it was

this is an interesting thread
it certainly fucks with my head
you ask for haiku
well poo poo to you
here is a limerick instead.

we are 99
your resistance is futile
us you will become

I submitted some to my local paper on the subject of Family (for some contest).

He was a roofer
So Dad, if you are up there?
This one is for you.
(rip off of a joke, I know)


We are family
I got all me sisters and me
We are fam-i-ley

Getting high on grass
Forgot that I was posting
Can't type a haiku

A fucking haiku
Why do people like them so
They're not very good

ass ass ass ass ass
ass ass ass ass ass ass ass
ass ass ass ass ass~

soul grim empty black
axe bloody used in thy hand
howling at dead moon

I need to get hired
I don't have very much cash
I'm really hungry

>>233
>>233
>>233

This. Seriously, I have little patience for people who call man made things "unnatural". Sure, artificial things wouldn't exist if man didn't exist, but the fact is that men are a PRODUCT of nature, and thus our creations, by extension, are natural. I find this arbitrary distinction disturbing. It would suggest that humanity is unnatural, and that in fact anthropocentrism is at odds with the natural order. But enough of that.

Now, for the haiku:

Balance of the heart
With the mind, body and soul
Renders good men whole.

first post on this board
must not fuck this up. DESU
DESU DESU DE

If I may say something
more and more everyday
I'll always say it

Winter winds
Coursing through my unwashed hair
Seasons make big change.

I'd rather not go
with you for Christmas shopping.
It's not you, it's me.

pass me that lighter
chain-smoking in the morning
after a late night

General, Our Men
Are running from the battlefield
Shamefur Dispray

>>287
I'm afraid that failed.
Line two: seven syllables,
You enormous tool.

Spray painted concrete
Tall weeds in the shallow stream
Cars pass overhead

>>271
In this context, natural is just a word that means "things not made by men". It's not an arbitrary distinction: trees, weather, animals, the land are all natural; things like social constructs, morality, technology and clothing aren't.

>>291
Do not quote me, sir
Though I believe 17
is correct haiku

SAGE has been used.

i do not know
how to even attempt
this thing called haiku

Industrial strength
Stupidity. Why did I
cook bacon naked.

Haiku? It goes like,
Five, seven, and again five?
I refuse to try!

This is a haiku
Made specifically for you
Now, I am going to poo!

I don't know how
to write these haikus
mystical shit.

SAGE has been used.

Go eat shit and die
Ok but what about you
Yeah you keep the dog

Beers in an alley
as trees look on in boredom
fuck you, stupid trees

Haikus are easy
Five, seven, then five again
Give us a challenge

>>314
A question of form?
Haiku is more than that, bitch.
It's about nature.

Black city streets gleam
lubricated in the rain
urban erotica

Twin peaks through the fog
Sawmill, burns like gasoline
Cooper approaches.

Rape, it is a thing
Sometimes it happens to you
Kind of like right now

I hope I don't win
the rules say to bring a friend
I don't have any

this is all surely
bound to stay put here on this
mostly ignored site.

>>226

Haiku writing is hard.
OP is an asshole.
Everyone should fuck off.

whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa
whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa
whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa

look to my keyboard
shot dead before looking back
never could touch-type

時 テ 深
間 ィ 夜
が ー の
経 は グ
過 寒 ロ
く ー
な
っ
...and yes, that shit is actually mine

Oh shit, the vertical one got fucked up, so sorry for doublepost:
深夜のグロー
ティーは寒くなっ
時間が経過

How the hell did I
Stumble upon this shit thread?
Time to an hero

(USER WAS FOUND TO HAVE AUTISM)

I'm on Ninety-Nine
Chillin' like a villain, bro
Dry cum crusts my shirt

I don't even use
this board and now I have to
write you some bullshit?

Alas, too early
You who fathered great beauty
Inherited death

While scrolling down
I saw OP's first posting
All I thought was "fuck"

what am I doing
killing precious moments here
Sacred life Wasted

>>233
Nature does not end
on the rim of our small world.
Just objects in space.

Sweet music unheard
Blind, Deaf, Dumb society
Nothing has changed

What is a haiku
Certainly not me or you
Nor a fancy car

99chan's changed
I was gone for a while
Now there's some new boards

I'm a new guy here

Everyone is Shakespeare?

I thought he was dead

I just wanted help
now you have sucked me into
a thread for haikus

I don't like haikus
They are very annoying
I will kill you all

You want a haiku?
I don't owe you anything...
You can have one, though.

it's self evident
bitches ain't shit but ho's
and tricks, nigga

Do you want haiku
Or do you want the truth, bitch
No more pretty words

I haven't been here
In my head nor in body.
What have I become?

>>418
Blackness means nothing.
You have failed in you haiku.
And now, you must die.

I needed some food,
I had a bag of crackers.
Now I have nothing.

Stop whining women
"Man" is gender neutral
And always has been

i am you, or me?
i'm touch by pain so are you
no original

I can't unsee this
Thread before me, wup-di-do
there is your haiku!

>>460
"man" is no longer
after we lost "spear-" and "wife-"
some time long ago

Yes, I am writing
Another haiku, because
I feel I have to

These are not haikus
You have all fucked up today
Now learn to haiku

This site needs more posts
99chan is stagnant
What are we to do?

>>469
What are we to do?
I know well what we will do.
Write some more 'haiku'.

Loneliness eats me
My disease has but one cure
Where's my candy girl?

I was scared to fall
But you showed me how to fly
We soar together

Matter is made of
Unidimensional strings
Vibrating and shit

Loneliness eats me
My dinosaur is the cure
Fuck yeah dinosaur!

I don't even know
How to haiku
Or sage on 99chan

We are in god's mind.
Waves and particles are thoughts.
8deep16me

Tree pic caught my eye
So colorful yet dreary
So haiku I write

dicks dicks dicks dicks dicks
penis penis penis wang
cocks cocks cocks cocks cocks

a creative mind
where is my inspiration
an aspiration

love love love love love
just greed, a selfish need
love love love love love

>>517
>5
>6
>5

この風は
ちょっと寒いので
ジャンパがほしい

>>519
Ching chang chong bong dong
Ming ting po ting tu zhing zhang
Wang dang dong ching chong

death metal is gay
sweeping is for janitors
smoke meth worship doom

I came to the /wri/
To see what's going on here
Now I write haiku

I'm not a racist
Brown people just gross me out
Is that a crime, man?

>>528
Is it /wri/ght to
fear and loathe brown dudes?
Irrational, yo.

I just want to die
why can I not stop scratching
let it just end now

hands not clasped in prayer
wrapping bandages instead
hon sha ze sho nen

Mug of room temperature coffee
Almost completely empty
I am going to drink the rest of you.

Had a great haiku
But dammit I forgot it
Please come back to me

I sat at my desk
Just writing little haiku
Bored out of my skull

I know one mantra:
Om Krim Kalyai Namah.
That is all I need.

Running o'er rooftops
Digitalised radio
Keeping my rhythm

Never give you up
Never gonna let you down
Never desert you

Where'd you put the rum?
Why is the rum always gone?
I want my rum back...

Generation: Dead
Chernobyl Generation
Digital Death Masque

I loved PS1
Remember Crash Bandicoot?
He was really cool.

That was a good speech
And imma let you finish
But I'm the greatest

A game of chess is
Like a sword fight you must think
First, before you move.

Also, seeing as people apparently know moonspeak, is this correct as a haiku, or did someone screw with me when they translated it?

東京で生まれ、私は死を覚えています

There's good memories
And good experiences
Both are important

Pale smooth rough smoke,
Just an urn, still and foundry;
What's a nebula?

Browsing 99.
oh god, this board is so dead.
come back 99!

Damn you, you caught me
Now I have to take the time
To write this haiku

Broke up a moon ago
Still thinking she's the only one
Wish we could still talk

'Tis merely a chan
this place, though it feels like home
years pass, still I lurk.

"99" or "4"?
Quality or quantity?
Which Chan does one choose?

Oh what could have been
But like Thanksgiving turkey
Soon /wri/'s head will roll..

My shoulder smarts bad.
I need Ibuprofen now.
Ah, indeed much better.

Hours pass without a thought
fuck I'm high
or maybe not

well what is this
i think i might like it here
strange but good

It's time you were told
You write like Kobe Bryant
And fuck like Hawking

This is like 4chan
But harder to navigate
Why does this exist

spine was bent all day
aspiring mountain flower
on the hunch I grew

Tried to type haiku
On my laptop on the couch
Connection was lost

Russian twerking girls
We cannot compete with this
The war it is lost..