nitpicky:
>as it drifted past on its
I don't think anyone should ever use semi-colons. Using "back" in two different ways so close together is a little awkward. I'd drop the luxurious adjective and shorten that line to something like "... wafted to my flaring nostrils"

Anyhow I think it has a nice calm voice, my advice would be to just speak plainly, don't try to pack in description, let it come about naturally from the narrative.

>>223
Thanks for the advice, I'd kind of given out hope on getting any. Re-reading through the sentence, I get what you mean about the "back" bit, it doesn't sit well, I'll drop the first one then...So lets try again:
It was one of those perfect moments, a picturesque memory of the kind that’ll stick in your mind for the rest of your life, and that you can never shake loose. The shifting summer breeze ruffled our hair and sent a shiver down my spine, as it drifted past on its never ending dance across the Australian heat. We sat together against a dune on the beach, you laid back with your body curled against my own, your head on my chest. The sweet scent of your luxurious hair wafted to my flaring nostrils. The sun was setting over the horizon, leaving a golden blaze on the ocean tops. If only life could be distilled in such a moment of perfection, if only it was infinitely amazing…

It's good, man. Keep the semi-colon -- it signifies a longer pause than a comma. Reads better.