You will always find reasons not to do it.

You are not happy and neither is he.

The sooner you change this, the better.

He lives his own life, and he was living it before he met you. He's responsible for his own life and if he chooses to spend it not getting therapy and being miserable then so be it; but it is not your burden to carry.

In regards to living situation, please have a rough plan for the time being (if you can stay at a friends for a while or something) because it's quite hard to break up with someone and still live with them.

Stand your ground. Break up and stay broken up; for now you need to take it easy and get your head straight.

FYI I'm in exactly your position at the moment. I understand how fucking hard and horrible this is, and I understand that it doesn't feel as easy as people make out. Most of my friends and family say "It's normal" or "Just leave if you're not happy". Anyway I know it's hard, but I believe in you and empathize.

>>3098 has harsh judgements.

Non-kink and kink seem remarkably difficult to reconcile. if the physical attraction is gone, barring cute neurological intervention, it's gone.

I can't teach you any effective defenses because I have none.

Guys have a hard time asking for help. Some of them have a hard time receiving help, at least directly.

Ideally, you both just wake up and start treating each other right, and whatever outside the house or in his past that's causing these difficulties is identified, and you both have the strength to put it to rest and not exacerbate it any further.

Alternately-ideally, you walk away from the situation, but stay attached and talk to people and massage the situation into being less dickish for everyone.

If he or you are on drugs, well, that might not be the cause of it but it might be what, when absent or improved, would improve your situations. Some drugs just aren't as kind as they could be.

Everyone gets scared sometimes. Hopefully we live in a situation where not acting aggressively doesn't have any costs.

You need a common language. Once things get too shifty or sketchy, you're back to acquaintances, and to go any further you need to reestablish healthy communication.

Lastly, in this society, the realization that you might be gay, or worse, the realization that you aren't gay but got gay'd in a really bad situation, is a real mind-wrecker. Guys'll talk about it when they're ready.

It sounds like he thinks you're cheating on him. It also sounds like you might be. My own positivist theory is that if a couple isn't meant to be then they'll be havin' dreams of 'other people' or see each other as such and the emotions between them will degrade. And don't just be all "They're just dreams hurf hurf". Real-seeming is real enough to cause problems, ergo, it's a fucking problem.

Sending wishes for the both of you to find friends and stability and lack of drama real soon. <3

I think you don't want to be in this relationship any longer, and I think that you ought to make the necessary steps to end it.

You can always reopen this chapter of your life, but in the short term at least, trying to force yourself to stay in a relationship that you're not comfortable in isn't going to help you, your boyfriend, or your relationship at all.

Do what's best for the both of you, have an open conversation about it, and make a decision that will help both of you.

If you're a pixie than this elf will always love you. You don't need Razel anymore

"The world on you depends or life will surely end, girl you've got to love your man."

Two and a half years is a real investment. Yes you have problems but they're your problems too. He cares about your soul, even if you don't believe in it. Isn't that nice? And you want to be used like a cheap plaything for his carnal pleasure. That's love. The last two years of your life weren't a test drive that ends back at the dealership. You can't just trade in your boyfriend for a kinkier atheist model. Leave him if it's really the right thing to do but think about the children you could raise in a loving home with someone you respect and are attracted to if you can get this right. Live the dream, don't chase it.

Forgive and ask forgiveness. He'll like that it's Christian.