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No. 3022
Oh mah gawd, I haven't visited 99chan in a long while - been skimming the threads on all the boards I frequented formerly just now, and stumbled across this one. Sounded oddly familiar, until I noticed that the drunk, happy OP was me :D
> Neat! Does your ladyfriend know you were a virgin?
Yes, she knew about it, and it was kind of my "hook" actually... "Wanna experience how it is to take someone's virginity...?" This was actually a question born of desperation and I never expected her to answer "maybe". It took a few months until it actually happened - This happened in a time of emotional turmoil for her, being in half-serious relationships all the while, so it took some time and a fair bit of persistence on my side until she decided to just go for it.
The fact that she knew about it made the act itself a lot less tense. It was still kind of awkward, as first times probably always are, but at the same time it was beautiful and we cuddled and giggled for hours afterwards due to the massive influx of hormones. It is a day I gladly remember.
> Congratulations mang, what was holding you back?
It's hard to pin this to a single deciding thing, of course. In general, I think it was me growing and changing myself for the better which at some point led to me being desirable. An incomplete list of things that I feel had a role in me getting to copulate and, more importantly, have a relationship:
- After severe issues with motivation for finishing my bachelor's degree and having a sucky personal life in general, I finally got help by going to a psychiatrist and subsequently getting cognitive behavioral therapy. This is probably the single most important improvement that catalysed a lot of further positive changes in my life.
- I play the guitar. She thinks guys playing the guitar are hot. I don't actually play it much on stage or in public much, but rather for myself. Maybe I'd had success quicker if I had put myself out there more, but I was always shy and didn't feel like I was good enough to bother other people with my music.
- Singing in a choir.
- Overcoming my hatred and derision for others, and when I had that down, overcoming my hatred and derision towards myself.
- Being bold, as a certain Casanova often propagated. (E.g. see "Wanna take my virginity?" above.)
- Anti-depressants.
- Deliberately putting myself in situations where I would be rejected by girls, if all else failed. However, I only did this when I felt I could take it on emotionally. This way, in the worst case, I got clear signals to break off pursuit of the girls I did this with. In the best case, I'd actually not be rejected, which happened with my now-gf. In other instances, I gained close friends from this.
That's all I got for now.
Sad to see this place is a bit deserted, but then again, look who's come crawling back after months. Reading your kind answers was a joy and I'll try to swing by here more often and share my experiences.
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