>>72612
A millionaire(billionaire?) trust fund kid in his mid-30s who constantly posts pictures on his instagram of himself cavorting around various exotic locations with a cohort of hot girls, shooting guns and gambling and hanging out with exotic animals.

I put the odds of his death by suicide in the next 5 years at 3:1

>>72615
Why do you think he'll kill himself?

>>72614
Bringing up a name with no other information, then telling someone to google it when they ask you who this person is or why there are relevant seems rude.

It hurts a lot to think I'll never be the 1%. I'm not sane enough. I get panic attacks over nothing at all. I'm scared.

>>72620 If you have a mental disorder you're already in a small part of the population. ^_^~

>Approximately 6 million American adults ages 18 and older, or about 2.7 percent of people in this age group in a given year, have panic disorder.

So cheer up, friend.

>>72615
I'm browsing through this dude's instagram and what strikes me most is how ugly and boring his house is. I have considerably less money than he does and mine looks very similar, although I am sure it is much smaller.

The only interesting thing about his pictures are the naked chicks.

>tfw you'd never be hot enough to hang with this douche :(

man, this guy's boring behavior is rustling my jimmies. He has a billion dollars and he spends it on fast cars and bitches. Couldn't he do something weird like the rich dude who turned his dead cat into a helicopter? Orvillecopter was cool.

Man, why are none of this guy's cars interesting? They're all shitty boring sports cars that cost way too much. why is this fag so boring

but seriously this is making me want to get titty implants

so jelly of these chicks

You learn how to make Chow Mein at home. Speaking of which, can someone teach me how to make chow mein at home? And where do I go if I desperately want wonton noodles?

>>72619
I dunno, I guess I thought he was more well-known than that. Responding with the two-wordified "goo gle" was my tongue in cheek 99chan dishness.

>>72622
I find most rich people have houses with no personality.

>>72623
Yeah he clearly has very little imagination, which isn't surprising considering he's a wannabe special forces poker jock. Everything he does and seems to like is something from an insecure small-town 16 year old boy's power fantasies. Still, as far as unimaginative ways of drowning out crippling existential dread, it beats my method (internet porn)

>but seriously this is making me want to get titty implants
>you will never be an instagram attention whore constantly denying that her butt implants are butt implants and getting plowed and given an "allowance" by a bro-billionaire ;_;

https://www.facebook.com/danbilzerianofficial
https://www.facebook.com/smushballofficial

>7.8m likes
>152k likes on his cat's page
how many of those do you think he purchased

>>72643
have you considered getting butt implants, anon? you should get butt implants

do you guys know of any billionaires who aren't horribly boring, apart from Bill Gates? Speaking of which, Bill was a hunk when he was young.

>>72645
You underestimate the power of living vicariously.

do instagram sluts ever treat their sugardaddies like they would treat friends, i.e. occasionally calling them fags

>>72648
Where would 7.8 million people have heard about this random guy? Was he on TV or something?

>>72650
they heard of him through instagram and facebook. this is the 21st century, onx

>>72651
I don't know much about instagram, but what kind of person would post about some random rich guy on their facebook timeline?

>>72652

They probably just liked the pictures of naked chicks.

http://www.chinasmack.com/2010/pictures/filthy-india-photos-chinese-netizen-reactions.html

You start a PR campaign to convince the Indians to stop shitting where they eat and to stop drinking corpse water. While we're at it, why not install some recycling plants around the country to help get rid of all the trash? This shit is bananas.

Would it be legal to get some water from the ganges, clean it and resell it as holy drinking water that won't give you anal malaria or whatever other disease can be caught from drinking garbage dump water?

>>72654
Probably. Truth be told, I fapped to that guy's instagram account. Dem titties man, dem titties.

>>72657
you could collect the bones and sell them, human skeletons are quite expensive

>>72652
They don't post about him, they just like his page so that his new posts and pics show up in their newsfeed so they can do this >>72657 (the second one, not the ganges thing) or feel masochistic jealousy or "hate" on him or >>72648 or motivate themselves to get rich because they think the only way to get laid is to be rich or whatever other motivation they may have to want to keep up to date on the goings on of the walking cliche of the millionaire playboy.

They don't post about him, they keep tabs on him for entertainment or anything else. Same goes for instagram: you follow someone's page and you are notified when they post new photos.

>>72655
You're describing what the World Bank has tried and failed to do in every impoverished country ever for the last 30 years. (hint: they don't fail due to lack of money, they fail due to too much of it)

>>72742

And yet schemes that provide small yet significant amounts of capital to the rural poor have had great effect. Simply handing money to local officials however does not work.

>>72663
>>72742
>>72744
This is ultimately the problem with just throwing cash at a problem. It can fix some problems, just as giving someone a sandwich will help them eat for the day, but the problems are ultimately systemic.

hellza the best way to go about it is the way China is now trying to deal with it. The problem with colonialism was that the European powers largely made no attempt to build up or "civilize" the countries they stayed in, particularly in Africa. People were kept as slaves and their lives and they were unable to resist. After colonialism the problem was painted as "raping" these countries of their resources. China is now cutting deals with African countries to extract valuable resources, and in exchange China has agreed to build up their infrastructure and allow them to actual grow out of the malaise. Western countries have attempted to do similar things, but its history and local fears of a colonial relapse has stopped it from hellza taking off.

In short, these counties need the ability to make their own money and grow themselves, not just more money so that the uneducated local governments and militias can rape the land and utilize brutal slave labor just as the colonialists did.

>So what do you do with $100,000,000?
kill call girls

>This is ultimately the problem with just throwing cash at a problem. It can fix some problems, just as giving someone a sandwich will help them eat for the day, but the problems are ultimately systemic.

As C level economist I will tell you, humans tend to act extremely rationally at the individual level, to a fault even, regardless of what social darwinists and puritans will tell you.

For example there's empirical evidence Obama's stimulus was used to pay off debt in 90% of cases, as opposed to directly raising consumer purchases as was intended. The irony of the policy was that people acted far too responsibly for it to work as intended.

Rather it is the failure of the political and moral establishment to change their ontological view of human rationality. This despite the contradiction of neo-liberal thinking, being espoused by individuals that nevertheless implicitly view the majority of the population as morons. It's the kind of cognitive dissonance most commonly associated with mental disorder.

The problem was never one of supply, but of distribution. This erroneous belief in the irrationality of the mass population at an individual led to the absurd notion that individuals with political power would outperform the choices of the marginal consumer, something that no algorithm or economic model is actually capable of doing.


China simply realizes that granting money to existing power structures is an investment made for political and economic gain. They don't even pay lip service to altruism, because a spade is a spade. You cannot have altruism without income redistribution.

Just a semi-permanent world vacation with a significant other is a ballza enough life for me at this point. We don't even have to stay at hellza nice places, in fact I would most often prefer not to. I figure about 200 per night for room (maximum) and 200 per day for ballza food and alcoholism with locals for us both is sufficient.

That's 145,000 per year. Call it 175,000 with transportation costs and whatever minimal shit I want to lug with me. I don't care what happens to the rest of that money and if I ever am lucky enough to calculate that I have a sufficient amount of funds in the bank to meet this criteria for the rest of my life, I'm just going to quit life and do that.

Fund a grant program that provides money to professional, semi-professional and emerging artists. It would function along the lines of how government arts grants work, in that you must have been exhibiting work or performing publicly for at least a year prior to application, and then you can apply for annual living-wage supplements, project-specific funding, travel expenses for attending festivals abroad and so on. I'd also look at funding after-school arts programs aimed at high risk youth (inner city kids, kids in foster care, kids coming out of juvenile detention, etc).

I would start out focusing on doing it where I live (Canada) for a while to iron out some kinks, and then I would expand to create similar programs in third world countries, providing funding for arts related education as well as providing money for living expenses, supplies, touring, etc. to artists and performers. I would probably also start a bursary or scholarship program to provide funds for people from third world countries to attend school abroad. Maybe I'd start some sort of promotion firm that focuses on bringing third world musicians to North America and Europe for tours and festivals as well.

I'd probably also try to establish some arts festivals in various locations to provide a forum for emerging artists to show work.

Most of this would be in the form of one-way grants, but some of it may be in the form of investment, especially for larger projects like feature films.

I may also provide funds to individuals and organizations dealing with legal issues in countries with state censorship of arts and journalism.

>>72770
And now that I'm thinking about it, I'd probably fund arts programs for Aboriginal communities, provide travel grants for artists in remote indigenous communities to visit cities and festivals as well as bring musicians and artists out to remote communities (fly Tribe Called Red out to perform a free show in Inuvik and shit like that), and have a grant program that focuses specifically on Aboriginal voices.

I'd also like to fund arts programs in the prison system and have grants specifically focused on individuals recently released from correctional facilities who are looking to establish a career in the arts.

Invest it in mutual funds with 12%+ return. Pay off mine and my parents' debt, buy mom a house, and houses for myself around the world. Probably invest in foreclosed property and fix them up.

Use the leftover to hire a personal chef, personal trainer, doctor, lawyer, accountant.

>>72773
What are you going to do with multiple houses around the world? You should at least rent them to people, don't just leave 'em to rot when you're not there.

I would attempt to build homeless shelters that do not suck balls. Surely there has to be a way to make them something other than cesspools of misery and rape.

Air BnB?

I'd also fund research in strong friendly AI.

I would fund the creation of some kind of virtual reality machine attached to a treadmill that would let you run through beautiful alien landscapes. This has to be feasible, right?

>>72744
I think this is part of the rationale to those charities that donate breeding pairs of livestock to poorer places so they can grow from there. If I were in that condition I'd make it rain chickens in the club.

I'd probably spend part of the $100M on musical instruments, both for myself and others. I'd be able to take a few more gigs if I had, say, a bass trombone or a tuba. The rest of the money would allow me to die reasonably not penniless if I pursued a career in music performance, as long as I wasn't too stupid with it.

>>72779
>reasonably not penniless
You'd by two horns and embark on a 20k/year career and still somehow blow through most of your $100M and only be "reasonably not penniless" by the time of your death?

>>72775
Maybe the thing to do would be to invest in subsidized housing, training programs, and mental health initiatives to reduce the need for shelters and provide better access to proper resources for those you do? I dunno... it's a tough one. The main thing with shelter's is lack of space; everything else is more systemic, beyond the shelter, rather than a problem with shelters themselves.

I guess you could fund a shelter with private rooms and tons of security, but you'd still end up with people throwing poop-covered needles at each other. Maybe a program to provide mental health and addiction services on the back end rather than focusing on front-end shelters would be the way to go?

>>72773
You'd need to hire an accountant and probably a lawyer before you did all that investing rather than using the leftovers to do so.

You: Alright, I've invested all my money! Time to hire an accountant!
Accountant: You invested terribly and your money is gone.
You: Why didn't I hire you first??!

>>72774
>What are you going to do with multiple houses around the world?
Not let >>72775's smelly homeless rapists or >>72771's dirty natives live there, that's for sure.

>>72783
Do you think the accountant is likely to give me better advice if I have sex with him?

Start a mining company on the moon.

>>72783
>You'd by two horns and embark on a 20k/year career and still somehow blow through most of your $100M and only be "reasonably not penniless" by the time of your death?
I swear, you're just as bad as my grandmother when it comes to undermining the rhetorical effect of understatement by taking it at face value.

Besides, you never know. I might be able to afford more than two horns. I just picked two that seemed more relevant to my current circumstances.

>>72784
That could go either way. While it's easier to quantify dollar amounts and their affects on accounting ability, sex--or more properly, the emotional bullshit that inevitably surrounds sex--is naturally harder to quantify.

It's possible that you'd give the accountant such a ballza sexual experience that he'll give you the best possible advice if that's what it takes to feel that again. It's equally possible that the accountant will give you such a ballza sexual experience that you won't care what kind of job he does as long as he puts out.

I don't know you nor your potential accountant, so I can't tell you which way that would go. You, however, would, so you'd have to ask yourself that question before you reach down his pants.

>>72788

I read this post in a British accent.

>>72784

I don't know, is your accountant gay?

  you donate money to this lady so she can cremate her goddamn cats

>>72786
Could you tell us more about your grandmother?

>>72834
At first I didn't want to because that sounded like a selfish derailment of the thread, but then today I had to listen to her tell me why she gets upset when I take a nap during the day. Apparently she's convinced that the only "real" kind of sleep that counts for anything is the kind that most people do at night, and she believes that naps rob people of a ballza night's sleep. Never mind that that's the entire point of napping, to be able to be awake at more socially convenient times.

I pay >>72849's grandmother $100mil to write a book of her worldviews and advice

>>72935
I'd buy it

>>72849

Your grandmother sounds like my grandmother. Why the fuck do grandma's gotta be so anti-nap?

>>72941

The price of naps skyrocketed during the Great Depression. Only the wealthiest could afford to take them. It's a relic from a bygone era.

https://news.vice.com/video/sex-slavery-and-drugs-in-bangladesh

you invest money in Dautladia to make it into the world's biggest, fanciest brothel. Imagine some nice Vegas type shit in a muslim country!

If it gained international attention it would probably get shut down, though. Bangladesh probably doesn't want to be known as "that country with the biggest brothel in the world". :(

>>71869
I would fund North Korea's nuclear program.